Friday, May 26, 2017

Dubious Bowling Records Not To Try For

"Hey, bruddah, what can you do after you have just completed the worst night ever of bowling?" Myron the Muse is not really asking me for advice. He is just lamenting about his seemingly "poor" night of league bowling. "Okay, so what kind of a night was it?," I ask.

"Well, let me tell you, he says; in the first game, I blow the 4-pin in the last frame and we lose by two pins."

"In the second game, I manage to shoot a 200, and we win by several pins; but, in the last game, I shot a 114 ….. (a 114!) … and we win by one pin."

"Wait a minute, that means that your team won the overall because you won two games and must have gotten the series total. Isn't that correct?" "Well, yes, but my performance was really terrible," the Muse whines.

As I see it brother, there's nothing you can do about it because it is gone, in the past, and you cannot re-do that night of bowling again. Just suck it up and get on with your life because as unfortunate as the time was, it might not have been your last "worst-ever game or series."

And with that, I mention to him another "Choc-List" of dubious and odd ABC (now USBC) records. If you feel bad about your own scores, consider that you don't want to be immortalized as follows:

1) In 1971, the lowest score ever recorded in league competition was rolled. Eighteen gutter balls and two 1-pin counts.

2) Were you one of the "fortunate" ones to have witnessed the 1991 nationally televised final of the PBA tour when all the pro needed was a 7-count and threw the ball in the gutter?

3) Between 1965 and 1967, the longest losing streak was recorded and reported for posterity - 120 straight losses. No mention of who they beat to end the streak.

4) Bowling in her first LPBT (Ladies Professional Bowlers Tour) event, this woman record setter bowled a 300 game in her very first game as a pro. For the next 17-games of qualifying, she failed to break 200 and ended up in last place.

Unless you are on the way to shooting a score of zero, or are rolling nothing but gutter balls, you won't be (I hope) close to setting any dubious record(s).

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